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Writer's pictureKaren Bigman

Becoming Me: A Journey of Motherhood, Reinvention, and Purpose



It took me 60 years to find my true calling. I hesitate to call it a “passion,” as that might diminish my earlier career as a stay-at-home mom—a role I’m proud to have embraced. The journey to finding myself felt like an endless quest for a destination, one that often seemed just out of reach. Each time I thought I had settled into a comfortable place in the world, that comfort quickly turned into discomfort.


Over 32 years ago, I left a short career in technology to raise my children—a decision that was right for our family at the time. With my ex-husband working long hours, we decided my energy would be best devoted to parenting. I’m extremely proud to have raised two wonderful, contributing adults. However, somewhere along the way, I lost my sense of self. Like many women, I became known as “my children’s mom” rather than an independent woman with her own identity.


For years, being a stay-at-home mom was my reason for not pursuing something else. I tried to keep my brain engaged by exploring various small pursuits: volunteering with the PTA, attending cooking classes, and even completing a short certification in restaurant management which led to a brief career as an event planner for some well-known New York restaurants.


On the outside, it seemed I had ambition and confidence. But on the inside, I was struggling. My 40s were marked by a deep depression. I felt unfulfilled by motherhood and isolated in my role as a stay-at-home mom. The idea of re-entering corporate America felt daunting, and my lack of confidence held me back. It seemed everyone around me had life figured out—whether they were thriving as mothers and wives or seamlessly balancing career and family. I didn’t know anyone who felt like I did.


As my husband climbed the corporate ladder, we drifted further apart. His success only magnified my insecurities. After 25 years of marriage, we realized divorce was our best path forward.


Though divorce is often a time of great upheaval, it sparked something in me. I started a business helping women navigate the challenges of divorce, which eventually led me to life coaching specializing in divorce. I worked with women facing high-conflict, high-net-worth divorces. While I found fulfillment in guiding people through their most difficult times, my empathic nature made it hard not to internalize their struggles. I eventually returned to my roots, doing small business consulting. While I was technically competent, the idea of "selling myself" was intimidating.


Whether it was a gift from the universe or the culmination of years of growth, everything finally clicked around my 60th birthday. Helping women in midlife became my calling.


Today, I’m proud to say that Taboo to Truth: Unapologetic Conversations About Sexuality and Midlife is on its way to its 100th episode. I’ve become a Certified Sexuality Educator through the Sexual Health Alliance and a Menopause Coach with Girls Gone Strong. I have never felt more purposeful or confident than I do now.


My journey is uniquely mine. I believe every struggle and achievement prepares us for the next step. No one can pick your path for you—they can support and love you, but the journey is yours alone. As I write this, tears come to my eyes. It hasn’t always been easy; there were lonely moments and desperate times. I can finally say I am exactly where I am meant to be, on a path that fulfills me and serves others in this world. Cheers to me!



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